Report: Interfraternity pledge-fighting ring under investigation

Late Saturday evening, Albion police officers blocked entry to multiple fraternities for investigation of what has now surfaced to be a top secret, inter-fraternal pledge-fighting ring. Rescued pledges, drenched in Natty Light and each others’ tears, were grateful to be discovered early Saturday morning during the weekly involuntarily matchups. As it turns out, the road to brotherhood is not what they anticipated.

“I just feel…betrayed,” a rescued pledge blubbered between sobs. “This isn’t what I signed up for. I wanted to do community service and learn to be a better man!”

The underground operation, which took place every Saturday in various fraternity basements, began in late January shortly after first-year males had accepted their bids. The pledges names were placed into a complex algorithm that randomly paired the young men to fight, despite their weight and size.

“Do you see these arms? I weigh 130 pounds. I can’t help it that mom chose not to breastfeed me,” the victimized pledge began to cry. “The ATOs—they just sat on me. And I—I just laid there.”

Around 10pm, campus safety and the Albion Police station received worried calls from residents living in Whitehouse. Though students living in the Hannah Street residence have grown accustomed to the soundtrack of fraternity life perpetuating through their poorly insulated windows, the students reported the noise that particular evening to be abnormally loud. One worried student called after hearing an alarming scream coming from an unknown fraternity, “Please, I’m just a little boy!”

Around 2 A.M., before being taken into immediate questioning, victims of the fights were spotted outside of fraternities. The young freshman appeared frightened and emasculated, wearing nothing but small diapers with Carebears printed on the front. On the back, the word “BITCH” had been carefully embroidered in black threading.

Initiated fraternity members involved in the scandal were willing to speak on the matter but wished to remain anonymous.

“’The bond of our fraternal brotherhood is built upon three pillars: respect, loyalty and character,’” a senior fraternity member cited his fraternity’s oath while fist-pumping a nearby brother. “We had to recite that shit in a handstand while swallowing peanut butter. See how I know that. That’s what brotherhood is all about.”

Fortunately for existing Greek members, all fraternities were cleared on charges of hazing. The presiding judge in Calhoun County court saw that that the young men were all engaged in some solid “character-building.”

Photo via Snapchat

About Alexa Hyman 29 Articles
Alexa Hyman is a senior from Chicago, Ill., studying Business and Professional Writing. You're likely to find her in another country, listening to Bob Dylan or sniffing the pages of old books in the campus library.


  1. This is complete blastfemy. The fact that ATO is brought up in this article is completely childish, being for the fact that the ATO fraternity WAS ON FORMAL! Barely any ATOs were even here. Pledges of this fraternity would never be pushed to engage in this kind of behavior.

  2. Dear ignorant young naive Rylan Probsy ~ Tho I was not there for this particular extreme hazing I did attend Albion College off and on between 1979 -1983. I guarantee you and promise you that ATO brother’s have had a notorious history of out of control intentional choices and actions.

    More than once during my attendance at Albion, young women were intentionally drugged and gang raped. Hence the cause for your ATO chapter being on suspension and then ultimately on a one year ‘shut down’ in 1984. My cousin Jon whom was an ATO pledge has confirmed that pledges, admin, coaches all knew of such abhorrent behavior. If HIS/story is neglected or avoided it shall repeat itself until Light shines. As an athlete and young woman at the time, paying out of state tuition with no scholarships, and coming from Chicago it was a bizarre and sad state to witness.

    I have had Albion alum of the ATO house (a quarterback and his receiver) and their two KAT girlfriends delight and relish in the retelling of their ‘glory gang’ days…. The two ATO brothers bragged of their role in the routine gang rapes… the two young women from Grosse Pointe also chimed in on their participation and witnessing…

    Their joint gross and revealing comment and confession while on an Albion reunion UpNorth was this….

    “I guess while V & Porky watched guard over the room that night as two privileged white girls from Grosse Pointe we should have done something…. not even a ‘nigger’ girl deserves 18 boys on her.”

    Senior year 1983 I was drugged while attending a toga party at the ATO house. THANK GOD Jeff Gregor ( Strohs) knew that as a top athlete I would never drink or do drugs, and he immediately swooped me up and carried me home to my dorm room for safety.

    Decades later, when certain ongoing events and violent behavior continued from 2 of the 4 alum, I immediately contacted useless Campus Safety, Maury Ditzler, UMC and police. They have never denied these atrocious decisions and actions of past Albion students or the 1 year suspension of the ATO house (reports were made and are in NY ATO if you care to review). Per standard operating procedure Albion (Bernie Lomas President) deny deny deny delay delay delay …. when in May 2015 the former Albion alum confessed their participation in more than one gang rape and more than one extreme hazing, Albion College current ‘leaders’ and legal counsel responded with the most bizarre answer…. that I never attended Albion College! I assure you I attended Albion College. I assure you these events are fact.

    For two ‘grown adults’ of privilege to personally deliver the following message in 2015 …: “Rebecca you know the problem with you is men leer at you, women despise you, and the BEST thing you could EVER do is CUT YOUR BREASTS OFF, and if you are not going to cut them off you might as well use them to get a rich man.” The couple never denied this direct threat to me. In fact following their brazen UpNorth confession the Ring Leader followed up with myriad other real threats (his father having been jailed for RICOH violations and gaming and directly connected to the mob). Hate begets hate. Ignorance begets ignorance. Truth begets Truth. Bravery and Courage and Right Action begets Peace.

    Tell me… do you think the young man who was being brutalized staged this event on his own… were the students who heard the uproar and cries for help fabricating and imaging these events.

    I assure you it only takes 1 or 2 ATO brothers to behave badly ~

    I currently work with the military and tho this is only my view and perception, most whom have seen all sides of war, will agree that rape is the lowest of the lowest acts and choices by man.

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