In anticipation of a holiday originally founded on the supernatural and terrifying your friends rather than cavities and partial nudity, here are some of the best worst horror films begging for a watch party, all available on NetFlix right now.
9. Evil Dead
This gory classic from Sam Raimi has all the ingredients of the worst kinds of films, but succeeds in every way by knowing precisely what it is doing. I’d gladly make fun of this, but our Lord and Savior, Bruce Campbell, has taken care of that himself.
8. Re-Animator
Based on a story by H.P. Lovecraft, this undead farce has more red blood than the the deep South and begs for a challenge involving simultaneous yogurt or lasagna consumption.
7. Snoop Dogg’s Hood of Horror
A trio of short films glued together by the universal charm of Snoop Lion – *ahem* – Dogg, Hood of Horror shows us the cringe-worthy underbelly of the inner city. Not a bit of your discomfort will come from poverty or crime. No no, there’s demons and zombies and white people and stuff. And Danny Trejo shows up to remind us to renew our dental plan ASAP.
6. Slither
A movie that would be perfectly at home buried in the back room of some 1960s video store, Slither surrounds the ventures of a fearless pioneer alien species, courageously settling the new world of Smalltown, USA, by infecting and slaughtering the present citizens in explosively bloody ways. Do I detect a hint of allegory?
5. C.H.U.D.
It stands for “Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers.” Have a good time.
4. Pinocchio’s Revenge
If Child’s Play or any of its numerous sequels were the last grasp yield of the killer doll crop, en route to becoming high fructose cooking oils rather than served up as a garnished side dish, Pinocchio’s Revenge wouldn’t have even made it to the supply truck. It’s still unclear what he needed to go on such a vengeful track for, but the puppet doesn’t really even do anything until the last half hour of the movie. So, that makes up for it?
3. Abraham Lincoln Vs. Zombies
Straight from The Asylum production company – the brilliant minds behind such original fare as The Day The Earth Stopped and Transmorphers – this movie requires no real introduction, as you can say the title and the whole synopsis issue pretty much resolves itself.
2. Creature
There have been a few different meta-joke comedy horror movies released over the past couple years – Tucker and Dale vs. Evil, The Cabin in the Woods – that poke fun at the traditional horror film set up. Creature seems like it could have been the only watch criteria for these filmmakers to see everything they need to mock. Look out for classic staples like, the creepy gas station attendant who warns of imminent doom! The jock character who guarantees nothing is wrong! And the irrefutable classic, full frontal exploitative nudity within the first two shots!
1. Easter Bunny, Kill! Kill!
Shot in glamorous “Toilet-Paper-Roll-O-Vision,” this timeless tale of Christian morals and sensitive depictions of the mentally handicapped crosses all cultural boundaries, uniting all races, faiths and lifestyles under one shared belief: this is a really crappy movie.
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