Students all across the campus are expressing their concerns and outrage over the college passing up on what they believe to have been the only obvious choice of theme for this academic year: YOLO.
This acronym has frequently been used as a reminder for those less fortunate souls in the world that they do in fact only live once, with no second chance. This is only one of the many functions of this seemingly obvious phrase, used often by the more adventurous of students before partaking in activities the likes of which could cause them serious physical harm.
“Whenever we’re unsure of whether or not what we’re doing is a good idea, we just remember YOLO”, said Benny Butter, a Hometown sophomore, as he was preparing for a stunt which suggests a serious lack of understanding about the human body’s resistance to abrasion. “Do we have a lot of thumbtacks laid out here? Yes, we do. Am I a hemophiliac? Yes. But none of that matters, because YOLO.”
“I think it’s, like, totally lame that YOLO isn’t the college’s theme for the year”, commented Erma Gerdson, a junior hailing from Blondesville, Florida. “We all, like, say it here, like, all the time! Even when getting ready to sleep or putting on shoes, like everyone totally needs to know about YOLO.”
Clearly the acronym YOLO is (for better or worse) very deeply ingrained in the lifestyles of the students of this college. The refusal to name it as the theme of the year is something of great importance to these dedicated and intelligent students. If nothing else, their unending concern to make sure that everyone in the world knows that they will only live once is something to be admired.
Nicely done, Albion. Please send your satirists our way. We love this stuff.