The Caffeine Deprivation Experiment: Day Four


Mr. Mackie said it straight up, “Drugs are bad.” Apparently the first seventy-two hours of detox are always the worst. Whoever said this is a liar, a complete and total liar. It’s the last few painstaking days that really test your endurance. Nevertheless, I am finally reaching the home stretch in my caffeine detox, as long as I’m not killed in the process.

A car veered off to avoid hitting me this morning. Seriously, it wasn’t my fault; I blame depth perception. It looked as though there was plenty of space between me and the blue sedan. I only took three steps into the intersection and suddenly the car had apparated towards me. Admittedly, I was standing obliviously in the street while the car avoided me, but I had the right of way.

On a more positive note, I was totally screwed out of going on the free Cedar Point trip this Saturday. The sign-up line was out the door. I considered getting into line, but the action of waiting has to be worth the time spent waiting. That’s why people stand in lines for movies or bars. I decided against it. Children stand in long lines for rides. Adults drive blue sedans and drink coffee. Then run over children in fits of caffeine euphoria.

I want to be an adult.

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