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Features Headline — 26 August 2013

By Alex Carey

You’re first-years. You’re new on campus. You will stick out, but here are some tips so that you you can lessen the question “Oh are you new here?”

1.     No varsity jackets.

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We get it guys, you were a star athlete in high school, and you have all the pins, badges and varsity letters to show for it. However, you are in college now, it is time to put the jacket away start accomplishing more important things.

 

 

 

 

 

2.     Don’t wear your lanyards around your neck. Just don’t.

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Even if you are being ironic, or trying to be funny, or you actually think it’s a convenient spot to keep your keys and I.D., do yourself a favor and just keep them in your backpack or your pocket. You already look like a freshman; there’s no need to scream it to the entire campus.

 

 

 

 

 

 

3.     The “Briton in Training” shirt should be worn sparingly.

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Awesome! Free spirit wear at orientation! Sure you want to support your new college, but don’t overdo it. Since you are a new face on campus people will just assume you are first year. That shirt will only confirm their assumption and prove how much more “training” you still have to do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

4.     At Albion, you are a “first-year.”

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You may be a freshman in college, but you are a first-year at Albion. When an upperclassman or professor asks what grade you are in, just answer “first-year” and ignore the voice in your head that may be saying “hehe, I sound like a Harry Potter character.”

 

 

 

 

 

5.     Just because a building has a key card entrance, does not always mean you need your I.D. to get in.

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Awesome, you just swiped your key to get into Wesley! Now later when you go to dinner do not be the dork who tries to get into Baldwin with your key. During dining hours, the building is open, no need to pull out your fancy new Albion I.D. to enter.

 

 

 

 

 

6.     Got Milk?

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Now that you’ve gotten into Baldwin, say you want some milk with your meal. The dispensers look funny, but please don’t look stupid while trying to get milk. Just pull the metal handle up, place your glass underneath the nozzle and voila! Every student was once that confused kid who only wanted a little chocolate milk with dinner, but instead stood fumbling with a random machine for five minutes in front of everyone.

 

 

 

 

7.     Be careful on weekends.

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Those first weekends on campus you will be eager to go out and party. That’s what college is for right? Sure, go have some fun, but girls, there’s no need to get super dressed up for a little frat party, and guys, don’t get kicked out of the frats your first weekend here for doing something stupid or disrespectful. You have four years of trouble to cause; don’t party too hard the first weekend and make a bad impression.

 

 

 

 

8.     Consent may be sexy, but your T-shirt doesn’t have to say it.  

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At some point all you first-years will go to a presentation about sex, and drinking, and parties. While it is an important talk, the shirts are just ridiculous. They seem funny at first, but you might as well put a “dorky freshman” sticker on your forehead if you’re going to wear that shirt in public.

 

 

 

 

 

 

9.     The crosswalk in front of Wesley is more like a suggestion.*

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If that red hand is telling you to stop, but Michigan Avenue is empty, just walk. That goes for any “major” road that runs through campus. At Albion, every student is that annoying pedestrian.

*We at the Pleiad are not encouraging you to start jaywalking.

 

 

 

 

 

10.  Storage on wheels is for airports, not a college campus.  

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In other words, stay away from rolling backpacks. Most of us are hopefully capable of carrying some textbooks around for a few hours each day. Unless you want to be mistaken for a professor, or possibly not make any friends in college, stick with the traditional shoulder straps.

 

 

 

 

 

This article was originally published 8/27 and since been updated on 8/27 to correct number 9 to better reflect the Pleiad’s intent not to encourage people to jaywalk.

The Albion Pleiad staff strives to correct all errors of fact. If you've seen an error in our pages, let us know at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . General comments should be posted in our comments section at the bottom of each article.

About Author

Alex Carey

Alex Carey is a sophomore from Birmingham, Mich. She majors in communication studies and double minors in French and business/organizations. She runs both track and cross country and is a member of the Delta Gamma sorority. Follow her on Twitter at @AlexxCarey.

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